I am a Complete Muppet

For the most part I’m pretty good with British accents, only, if they start speaking faster or saying things in ways I’m not used to I get awfully confused. I went to KFC the other day because I wanted to eat the Zinger Tower meal (the Zinger Tower sandwich is a Big Crunch sandwich with salsa sauce, instead of the other standard hot sauce, and a hash brown wedged into the sandwiched), which is a staple of all my trips. It’s so freakin’ good. Here’s a tip for all you fellow obese North Americans: order the large combo, because the regular combo in Europe is puny. The large combo is the same as our medium sized one. Yes, we’re a bunch of fat fuckers.

Anyway, I ordered, thinking, all I have to do is say what I want, but she asked me all these questions afterwards too and I was completely lost! The only one I managed to answer properly was what drink I wanted, the other ones I just blindly guessed and said no to (since I assumed she was trying to add more stuff to my meal for no reason).

At the end of the order, when people in Canada normally ask if it’s “for here” or “to go” she asked: “are you staying here?”

That confused the shit out of me, even though it makes perfect sense. It just seemed a bit vague, and considering how I sound so obviously Canadian, it seemed as if she was asking me about my sleeping arrangements, so I said “yes, in Manchester,” only, luckily for me, she walked away before I finished and looked liked like a complete muppet.