Can’t Say You Hate It Unless You’ve Tried…

For the last few years I’ve shot down pretty much all invitations people have given me to go to a club. I’ve said, flat out, that I will never go for two main reasons:

1) I hate loud music.
2) I hate people getting into my space.

Of course, the next question that follows their invite is usually:

“Have you ever been to a club? No? How can you hate something you’ve never been to?”

And there we have it. Their trump card. How can I hate something I’ve never done? How is it that I can know before I have tried it? Well, pretty simple really. You can use that argument for food, because it is very difficult to imagine how something tastes so you can’t really hate how something tastes before you’ve tried it (although, in some cases, you’re right to assume it’s going to taste terrible). But, I’ve been in situations before where it’s been cramped and I’ve had people get into my personal space and I didn’t like it. I’ve been in bars before that decided that the music wasn’t loud enough until it can muffle a space shuttle launch and I hated it. So if you put the two together, I doubt it would create a positive experience. I thought that was a safe assumption to make.

Nonetheless, I went to Nava today, because I convinced myself that maybe I was wrong. Maybe if I got there, things would magically change and two bad things would somehow come up positive. Like, if you decided to blend Brussels sprouts and dog shit together, and a unicorn flew out of your blender, that would be awesome, but unlikely.

Anyway, “try to keep an open mind” was my mantra for the evening. I got in, got patted down, then paid the cover charge ($15.00!! Up yours Nava! I don’t care if Nick Carter had his birthday here, this is ludicrous), and made my way inside, and sweet Jesus!!!!!

Why the fuck am I here?!

No amount of slutty girls dressed as nurses, superheroes and cheerleaders will make loud music any softer, and people any further away. I was constantly getting prodded and pushed around as I made my way anywhere in the place, all while I had to listen to music that was so loud that my ears are still ringing as I’m writing this (3 hours after I left.) I go out to relax, I go out to enjoy myself and for that to happen, I need to be in an environment where I feel comfortable. Clubs are not my thing, they were never my thing, and today, despite the fact that their argument was largely unusable in the first place, I can safely say “no, I’m not going to a club because I hate it. And yes, I have been before.”